I have a friend who is a Psychologist (Dr. Paul) and he sends out a weekly ezine in my email. I love everything he has to say, but some things hit me like a ton of bricks. Like today. This is what he sent:

"Robert Kiyosaki in his book, Before You Quit Your Job, gave this advice regarding mistakes: So every time you make a mistake, stop, and take the opportunity to learn something new, something you obviously need to learn. When something does not go your way, or something goes wrong, or you fail, take the time to think. Once you find the hidden lesson you will be thankful for the mistake. If you are upset, angry, ashamed, blaming someone else for the mistake, or pretending you haven't made a mistake, you haven't been thinking hard enough. Your mental capacity hasn't expanded enough. you haven't learned the lesson. So keep thinking. (p. 37)"

This goes along with what my therapist said: "Our trials are the schoolmasters of our lives. Let them teach you."

Since going back to school I have had to learn this important lesson even more than ever. It has really helped me understand that nothing is perfect in this life. I can't make every assignment perfect. I will make mistakes. And instead of downing myself, I can look upward to my Heavenly Father for help and understanding as to how my failures, and trials for that matter, can make "weak things become strong." (Ether 12:27)

There is a lesson to be learned around every corner of life and I am determined to graduate this life with plenty of knowledge and a "Well done, thou good and faithful servant."

My opposite birthday

Yesterday I turned 42. I thought about the things that were happening when I was 24 and here is what I came up with:

The year was 1989
I was much younger
No grey hairs on my head
Not a wrinkle in sight
I was a mother of 1
I was 6 mos. pregnant with #2
I had been married for 2 1/2 yrs to the love of my life
I lived in a 2 bedroom apartment that cost $250 a month rent
We owned a brown Toyota Celica
I was a stay at home mom
My dh was a recent graduate of BYU and working as a Produce manager

Best song that won the Grammy was "Wind Beneath my Wings"
"Rain Man" won the Oscar
CMA's entertainer of the year was George Strait
LA Law was the outstanding television drama series

The Berlin wall was open to the west after 28 yrs.
George Bush was inaugurated the 41st president of the US
cost of a first class stamp was 25 cents.

Now in the year 2007:
I am much older
Plenty of grey hairs on my head, but I haven't broken down YET to color my hair
Plenty of wrinkles
Mother of 7
No more pregnancies for me
Married for 20 1/2 years to the same love of my life
I live in a 4 bedroom, 18oo sf home, that cost more than 3X's the rent I use to pay
We drive a 1990 Chevy 9 pass. Suburban
I am a stay at home mom still and going back to school to get my degree. Wow!
My dh changed careers and now works for the state. But, still works in the produce dept., at the same grocery store, as a part timer.

I don't watch and keep up with entertainment much anymore, but George Bush Jr. is now president and a first class stamp now costs 39 cents.

As I look in the mirror I see plenty of change.

As I look at the world, I see even more change. Computers, cell phones, internet, Credit cards galore, more wickedness and despair than I even thought possible 18 yrs. ago.

As I look at my growth I see the biggest change of all. I have more faith, more hope, more love, more blessings, more friends, more knowledge, and more to look forward to.

So, here's to another year of growth and change.

The Book of Mormon

This year one of my goals is to read the BOM. I am reading it with my dh. Every time I read it I get more and more out of it. This is the beauty of repetition. We go to the temple and do the same things over and over, yet I get more understanding.
I love the BOM and I am excited to see what I can gain from it yet again. The gospel is such a blessing to me.

I know from experience that my life is meant to be challenging. Look at all the events in the BOM. It is really teaching me so much right now.
I had a bishop once tell me that no matter how bad I feel about what is happening to me, that there will always be someone else who has it worse.
Take this family for example:

http://www.ksl.com/?nid=148&sid=830228

The pain and suffering is unimaginable, but I know they will get through, because this is part of life. So, this must mean that I will get through. "The Sun will come out tomorrow" as "Annie" would say. No matter how corny it sounds, it's TRUE! Heavenly Father gives us hope. The BOM gives us hope. The gospel of Jesus Christ gives us hope. That is what I need to hang on to right now. I just need to be patient.

When it rains it pours!

What is it with this saying? I'd appreciate a sprinkle now and then. Forget the black cloud that hangs over our home way too much. At least way too much for our bank account. Between the regular stuff to budget, we need a car...our washer fixed...braces...glasses...wisdom teeth out...school fees paid off...etc...etc. So, I prioritized our needs and I continue to pray that maybe braces and glasses can get to the top of the list. If everything else would stop coming up, or breaking, then maybe there would be a chance in heaven. I don't see it. I'm pessimistic today.

No wise words of wisdom to ponder. Only juggling. Juggling an armload of stuff with an umbrella that is too small, and I'm getting soaked!

Thought

A formula for a successful life:

Wake up
Show up
Follow up

I like it!

Who, with success in their lives, hasn't followed this mantra? No one I know!

Enough said.

Fear...

I started a new class today. Conducting. I'm excited and terrified. Standing up in front of a group of people who are looking to you to direct them can be quite intimidating. At least I think so. This is my first real experience. Now, I have directed music for Young Women's, and primary, and Relief Society. But never in Sacrament meeting. Never a choir. I can't even comprehend it. But it's coming. This class will push me into it. My teacher is the conductor in our ward. He is very good at what he does. Why I write this, is because he said something very profound today...

Fear is good, because it means you are in a growth experience. Let the fear push you to learn and grow.

My first reaction is, 99% of the time, when I'm faced with fear, I want to run. Run fast, run far, run away. This statement has made me rethink that strategy.

Example: I knew I needed to go back to school. I had received inspiration, and support from my family. If I would've given in to my fear, I wouldn't be back right now. I'd be sitting home in the wish mode. Wishing is thinking, but not doing. I want to be a doer, not a wisher.

So, fear will drive me to be uncomfortable, standing up in front of people I don't know (yet) in my class, to be judged and analyzed as I learn a new aspect of music. I will let my fear drive me to success.

Oh, I'm scared!

New Picture

And I took it by myself.

Me.
Almost 42.
Loving school.
Lots to do!

Goals for 2007

*Read the Book of Mormon
*Exercise 3-4 times a week
*Teach my children more about the gospel
*Deal with change better
*Maintain a better self-esteem
*Go to the temple once a month
*Laugh
*Love
*Live

Happy New Year!

What I learned in 2006

*Life is definitely like a rollercoaster.
*Although the rollercoaster can be scary, it can be fun.
*Life is what YOU make of it.
*My family loves me despite all of my faults.
*I have a brain that works.
*My eyes have been opened to chronic pain, and what it can teach me.
*Our life here on earth is all about learning, enduring, and overcoming.
*Life is fragile.
*A life lived with faith and hope is a happier one.
*A life lived with the gospel of Jesus Christ is a better one.
*God helps people through people.
*Love in a marriage is much deeper after 20 yrs. If people would just give it a chance.
*To have love in a marriage is a blessing.
*What I am learning from being a mother to 7 I cannot learn any other way.
*Friends can lift you up in times of sorrow.
*Paying tithing really can bring about miracles.
*People will try to hurt you, but you can choose how to react.
*Heavenly Father abandons no one.
*Love is eternal.
*I can do this!